When turning 13 it’s a
joyous occasion in any young kid’s life. It marks the first year of being a
teenager, and not being referred to as a child.
When I was 13 it was a whole different experience with me. I had to grow
up fast, and become an adult before I was even able to be a teen. I was on my
own, homeless, alone, and scared. I was still a child but I had to become
something I wasn’t ready for. No child is ready for anything this dramatic.
I was just freshly turned 13 when my whole world has
changed. While waiting for the school bus my father came to the stop to tell us
something. Little did I know that morning that my whole world was about to
change. Something set my father off and he went after me dead set on beating me
that morning. “You little fucker I am going to beat the shit out of you” He
said. I did the only thing I could have done I ran. I ran all the way to my grandpa’s
house and locked myself in the bathroom. He chased me the whole way screaming. That
day changed everything in my life.
Your parents are supposed to be the people you look up
to. Mine was something else altogether. My mom was a shy lady who took too much
abuse over the years. My father was an abusive alcoholic who treated me worse
than the other kids. That day he yelled and chased me was the last time it ever
happened. I am not sure what brought it on that day. Maybe I said the wrong
thing at the bus stop, or maybe he was out to get me. All I do know is that day
changed my life dramatically. So it wasn’t a huge shock for people to find out
what happened that day.
My grandpa didn’t know what was going on. All he knew is
that I ran into the house crying and screaming that my father is going to beat
me. See at that time we was living with them and they was helping my parents
out. It wasn’t until I came in there crying and yelling that my grandpa decided
he had enough. I remember him saying to my dad “you are not going to lay a hand
on him.” And then he tossed them out with no place to go and let me stay there
to continue to go to school. I already looked up to my grandpa but this made me
realize how much he really does care for me.
My grandparents didn’t have much to offer me. I took a
few months to collect myself before I started to move on. I was staying
anywhere I could find, and sometimes it lead me to sleep outside. I lived in a
small town where everyone knows everything, and they all knew my situation. I
bounced from place to place, couch to couch, and porch to porch all my high
school years. From the age of 13 until I was 21 I didn’t know what it was like
to sleep in a bed. It is the little things you take advantage of, and when you don’t
have them anymore you realize how much you have missed them when you finally
gain it back.
Was my life hard? Yes it was. Was the choice mine to
leave at the age that I did? Yes. I did it because I felt at the time it was
right. I did fall into the wrong elements, drugs, alcohol, and attempted suicide.
I had no one to turn to with all these issues because I thought everyone was
against me. Through everything my Grandpa stood beside me and treated me like a
person. He was my rock and gave me the strength to be who I am today. My
relationship between my parents still isn’t the best, but I still talk to them.
Sadly my Grandpa passed away in 2007, but he lived a full life. Right before he
passed away he was asking about me. I didn’t go see him. I didn’t want to see
him at his worse and wanted to remember him at his best. The man that was more
of a father to me then my own father and would love me no matter what I do.
One thing before he got sick that I remember him telling
me was this. “No matter what you do Chris, or how you do it, all that matters
are that you tried. And no matter what I will still love you.”
